And Ritual Instructions

What’s Up Heathens! Today on the Daily Bible Podcast, God is giving Moses the ritual instructions for ordaining priests, cleansing their sins, and the daily sacrifices to this totally not psychotic blood god. OH! He also gives Moses the first set of Ten Commandment tablets (spoiler: they get broken by the Jews) that was penned with his mighty lightning “glory.”

Today is not at all a psychopathic laced bible reading at all. God starts out outlining how they are to slaughter a Bull and Ram every year for whatever reason. Then the Jewish people are to cover their right ear, toe, and thumbs in the blood of their sacrifices. I’m still unsure as to why this whole playing in blood thing is needed. After they slaughter the animals and bathe in their blood, they have to burn their carcasses for … reasons. At some point they have to wave parts of the animals in the air like they just don’t care.

To be ordained a priest they have to do similar blood bath stuff. They have to cover themselves in the blood of their slaughtered livestock and then coat the horns of the alter with blood and entrails. You have to imagine someone totally foreign to these people watching this happen and stepping away slowly. Anyways, the people being ordained have to wear the blood of the animals for 7 days. Also, before entering the temple the priests have to wash their hands and feet because God will be damned if he lets them track mud into his house.

God ends it with giving him the tablets.